Tuesday, January 16, 2007

The American Anti-Idol

George W Bush is the new American Anti-Idol. Think about it -- would you buy his records? His old hit singles are no longer charting. Weapons of Mass Destruction featuring "Aluminum Tubes," "Mobile Biological Weapon Labs," and "Nigerian Yellow Cake Walk" made an initial impression but faded fast. His next album, Mission Accomplished, flopped immediately, and every release since then has been the same old song and dance, a pathetic Vaudeville turn. The curtain comes down quickly before the jeers and rotten fruit can reach their target.

Yes, I along with the masses, watched the first episode of AI 6 this evening. It is a show that focuses on exposure -- of individual delusions, desperate attention-seeking and sometimes actual talent. Whether you are a sadist or a masochist, American Idol has incredible appeal. We watch people suffer utter humiliation as they confront their own lack of ability, while others compete to show off their lack of originality -- all to achieve 15 seconds of fame as an audition reject.

George W. Bush should go before a panel of judges who will tell him what he needs to hear. That he has no talent for statecraft, that he is incapable of honest self-reflection, and tone deaf when it comes to listening to intelligent advice. I want to watch his face contort in disbelief as a panel of experts tell him "NO, you are wrong for this, you must leave."

I want to see the president run out the door ("No not that one, the other door!") into the consoling arms of Laura, Condi and Harriet. They will scoop him up and gently unpin his audition number from his tie. They will cluck and coo, but he will be inconsolable. He wins no golden ticket to the Presidents' Hall of Fame. Infamy will follow him the rest of his days, but unlike William Hung there will be no novelty recordings.

4 comments:

microdot said...

I for one would love to see Simon rip him to shreds!
Hilarious post! I can almost imagine a techno piece called "Mobile Biological Weapons Labs"....What a great name for a band!
Have a great time in Washington this weekend! It's time for a worldwide American Revulsion Day International Protest!
I remember the big protests before the Iraq War started, we went on a bus with a group of activists from this region to Paris!
That was a great day, it needs to happen again!

KevinBBG said...

The image of Simon berating our dear president is a nice one, but not as nice as the one I have of George old and gray behind bars.

Sebastian Black said...

Let's leave it to the experts--Stephen and John--to berrate Bush. They do it with panache and flair. I saw some of the poor Idol contestants being ripped apart from the spiteful panel. Really cringeworthy. That sort of nastiness goes on in American high schools every day. I heard that after going through 3 auditions, those poor souls thought they had been chosen for their talent--unaware that they had been especially selected for mockery because they had no talent at all. Worse, the panel zeroed in on their physical shortcomings--hateful enough to make some of them go out and commit suicide. When it comes to talent, where is it hiding itself in Paula Abzug, the English guy, and the other guy?

Village Green said...

Sebastian, were you watching Scarborough tonight? He did a segment pointing out the same things re: this year's Idol. And to prove his point, he played clip after clip of those poor deluded people to be laughed at all over again. As they will for all eternity now on YouTube.

Seems to be the complicity is on all sides here. The producers of the show think this is the kind of stuff that sells. Cruelty will increase the ratings and yet -- 10 thousand people lined up to audition in Minnesota for the chance to be on TV. What kills me is that family and friends allowed some of these poor creatures to even consider auditioning.

The difference this year is the focus on those with obvious physical, mental and/or emotional problems. Past seasons focused on those who were obviously there with some kind of gimmick to seek their moment of video immortality. Most of them knew they were awful. The two episodes we've seen so far are straight out of One Flew Over a Cuckoo's Nest